When boys and girls first learn the sport
Of cricket, yes you know the sort
Of bowling whizz and willow wielder
Or maybe just an awesome fielder
They sit up late in bed at night
And dare to hope that some day they might
Take the field and don the black
Or orange of those two teams that
Compete in this prestigious game
The pinnacle of sport, the same
And only chance to prove their skill
Or maybe just get drunk, but still
They wait and dream and hope and pray
That maybe they will reach the day
They cross the rope, puff out their chest
And compete in the Supertest.

In this year’s tale the Road went first
And faced the might of Jinks and Hirst
And captain Marchant, Warman, Cloke
With Shone, Blake, Fish (insert pun joke)
And Barker, Mackrell, tall Paul Cole
(They say he is a sickly soul).

The Badgers struck and struck again
Until Watson and Cocken came
To play their shots, set firm their grip
And score a decent partnership.
They threatened more but did not count
On wickets of a high amount
From Chunderpaul, the one man who
Can spin it square past me and you.
He ripped it in with flight and grunt
And kept his side right in the hunt
Till he collapsed, barely alive
But grinning, claiming wickets five.

Two hundred runs, indeed one shy
A target that was not too high
And so the batsmen set about
Their task with guile, technique and clout.
Jinks saw the ball and struck it hard
It travelled yard on yard on yard.

The Badgers cruising
King’s Road losing.

But lo! The game swung back again
Joshi and Cocken. Him! The Same!
They ran in hard, they set their traps
And Badgers duly then collapsed.
Now Gloverman came steaming in
He sensed the game was there to win
Poor Shone and Fish, could they survive?
The match had really come alive.

Survive they did, albeit close
(This poem’s getting too verbose)
How best the score to intermix?
Badgers seventy-eight for six.

A new day dawned, King’s Road on top
They rushed out to put a full stop
To Badger hopes, a knockout punch
Would this be all over by lunch?

Yet Badger fur is strong and thick
Their talons sharp, their cunning quick
They hunt in packs and when in need
Recover with alarming speed
So Badger fans be of no fear
There was an eager batsman here.
Although he may be skin and bone
You simply can’t discount the Shone.

That morning he, Mackrell and Cole
Moved on from just damage control
They edged up to the King’s Road score
The crowd called out for more and more.
“The Zone,” they chirped, “Leg side,” they yelled
And soon Shone’s bat aloft was held.
The crowd saluted batting nifty
He’d notched up a vital fifty.

A lead of twenty was the deal
When breaking for the luncheon meal
And though the match had swung once more
The likely result was the draw.

Stu ‘Laser’ Barker disagreed
As opening with bounce and speed
He bowled with panache and aggression
A great start to the pm session.
Three wickets down and still behind
The Road dug in and sought to grind
A long innings, to see them through
While Badgers aimed to turn the screw.
More wickets fell but runs came too
The clock ticked on, the shadows grew
And though at times it seemed quite tough
The Road’s batsmen had done enough.
The sun dipped down beneath the trees
And faintly from across the breeze
A name was very clearly sung,
Joshi, India’s number one.

There still was some time left to play
Could Badger batsmen win the day?
The Road were now all out and so
Mackrell and Blake came out to mow
The ball across the boundary
Their task was clear for all to see
A marvel they would have to fix
The target: 1 3 2 from 6.

We’d seen this sort of thing before
With hooks and pulls and drives galore
From Bob Mackrell, and yet this time
A mountain remained there to climb
He set his stance and crouching low
Delivered blow on blow on blow.
A weighty bat his chosen tool
With jelly babies as his fuel
Attempting to make history
With poise, brute force and flourish he
Repaid the crowd’s enraptured calls
With 41 from 18 balls.

Blake was still there standing tall
As he was yet to face a ball.
He carried on and copied Bob
Two fours, one six impressed the mob
But as four further wickets fell
The final bell began to knell.
The time ran out, the match was done
And neither side could say they’d won.

The game was drawn, the spoils shared
A weekend when all members dared
To reach new heights, to chase the dream
To test themselves to the extreme
The players all were bruised and battered
Competitors intensely shattered.

So to the pub for jugs of beer
Cheers to the Road, see you next year.

Saturday 1st September 2012 Badgers Battersea Badgers vs KRCSC Kings Road Cricket and Social Club

Kings Road Cricket and Social Club 199 for 10 (61 overs)

  • Cocken 39 (84)
  • Watson 29 (86)
  • Da Silva 22 (34)
  • Sherman 22 (48)
  • Cole 5/44 (14.4)
  • Mackrell 3/27 (11)

Battersea Badgers 219 for 10 (57 overs)

  • Shone 55 (95)
  • Mackrell 42 (58)
  • Jinks 38 (46)
  • Cole 26 (38)
  • Cocken 3/18 (7)
  • Joshi 2/31 (13)
  • Small 2/56 (15)

Kings Road Cricket and Social Club 151 for 10 (53 overs)

  • Joshi 42 (45)
  • Watson 33 (62)
  • Barker 3/15 (8)
  • Jinks 2/17 (6)
  • Cloke 2/17 (4)

Battersea Badgers 71 for 5 (6 overs)

  • Mackrell 41 (18)
  • Joshi 3/5 (1)
Full scorecard
More Recent Articles
  1. Very keen to get going

    Hampstead match report 5th Jun 2016 — by Peter Cade
  2. St Badger’s first letter to the Corinthians

    Corinthians match report 9th Oct 2015 — by Martin Cloke
  3. Last Chance Saloon

    Seveno match report 8th Oct 2015 — by Richard Dollimore
  4. Soulless King’s Road retain the South London Ashes

    KRCSC match report 30th Sep 2015 — by Chris Shone
  5. Prague

    Czech 11, Brno and Bohemians match reports 29th Sep 2015 — by Peter Cade
  6. Will someone think of the Helmet?

    Southbank match report 26th Sep 2015 — by Richard Dollimore
  7. May the (Kingstonian) Fourths be with you

    Kingstonian match report 25th Sep 2015 — by Peter Cade
  8. A Shrieking Toad

    Kingstonian match report 18th Aug 2015 — by Josh Lee
  9. Morse cracks Southbank code

    Southbank match report 17th Aug 2015 — by Chris Shone
  10. Bam Bam II: Bam Harder

    Hampstead match report 16th Aug 2015 — by Peter Cade
  11. Badgers level the series

    KRCSC match report 15th Aug 2015 — by Chris Shone
  12. It’s my birthday...

    Faire match report 29th Jul 2015 — by Richard Dollimore
  13. 100 up for Foord (again)

    Oakhill match report 29th Jul 2015 — by Chris Shone
  14. Badgers 10 – 0 Thesps

    Thespian Thunderers match report 20th Jul 2015 — by Chris Shone
  15. Hamblin’s heroics han’t halt Hadger hefeat

    Seveno match report 4th Jul 2015 — by Chris Shone
  16. Badgers are blue, dilly dilly, Lavender’s green

    KRCSC match report 28th Jun 2015 — by Paul Cole
  17. First the sun shone, then Shone shone, then Paul Cole won (for now)

    LJs match report 24th Jun 2015 — by Robin Mackrell
  18. This ain’t no game for kids

    Believers match report 30th May 2015 — by Richard Dollimore
  19. Girlfriends don’t like Cricket, Oh no....THEY LOVE IT

    Thespian Thunderers match report 29th May 2015 — by Peter Cade
  20. Ben’s lost balls

    Itinerants match report 29th May 2015 — by Chris Shone
Older Articles