“When you play the game of cricket you win or you lose. There is no middle ground
(…apart from when you draw or tie).”
Perhaps it was with such stirring words that Chris of House Shone, first of his name, Lord of Battersea, leader of badgers, maker of puns and teacher of small children sent out his men, bearing the badger sigil on their chests, to face a horde of… fairly well turned-out actor types.
With a track looking as trustworthy as any character in King’s Landing and an outfield resembling the Dothraki Sea, run-getting was always going to be tricky. However, wickets tumbled from the off and in no time the Badgers found themselves staring down the barrel at 27/4. Some middle order biffage, instigated by the Master of Parties, Jim Hamblin, saw the total creep up to three figures, but ultimately the Battersians fell at least 20 runs short of a competitive target.
Obviously Badgers don’t give up that easily (unless perhaps they’re a bit tired or hungry or something), so Lord Commander Shone opted to try mixing things up and opened up with Master of Battlefields, Pete Cade and his twisty turny stuff. Sadly for those of a black and white inclination the former badger turned sell-bat, Robertshaw, marched out for the Thesps and proceeded to make batting look depressingly straightforward. Master of Jelly Babies, Bam-Bam Mackrell briefly offered his captain some control, but the runs kept flowing and despite a small collapse at the end of the innings the Lannisters Thespians romped to victory.
P.S. The Thesps had an actual knight of Westeros playing for them, and your intrepid reporter managed to bag his wicket. OK, so it was a rank full toss, and OK he also hit me for a six and OK some people claim he was just an actor who plays a knight but still: bragging rights innit.