The Badgers signed off their 2014 season with a win and plenty of needle against Kingstonian. Differences of opinion over the use of a new ball, accidental bouncers in the fading light and maniacal shouting by one of the opposition whenever a spectator stepped onto the pitch were some of the highlights in this feisty encounter.

Taking a rest from the mantle of captaincy, Dollimore passed the leadership reins to vice-captain Foord and strapped on his pads to open the innings. At the other end was Cloke, who had already scored more than 500 runs in the season and whose ‘doggy fun palace’ the RSPCA were eying with intense interest.

Early wickets slowed the Badger progress but Cloke remained steadfast and reached his fourth half-century of the season. Batting with Cole at the other end, the two men treated the crowd to some hilarious running, which involved plenty of sledging for suicidal calling and poor backing up. Incredibly, neither was run out and Cloke edged on to 59. He found himself closing in on an incredible 600 runs for the season but couldn’t quite get over the line, chipping the ball to backward square leg just 5 runs short of the milestone.

That was the cue for Mackrell to go ballistic with the bat. As if someone had whispered in his ear that Kingstonian didn’t like jelly babies and believed that all physics teachers were big girly sissies, he launched a ferocious attack on everything that was thrown at him. His half-century came off just 23 balls and he catapulted the Badgers to a total of 200 all out.

It was at this point that Foord’s authority as captain came into question. Having sent out a clear warning by e-mail that pork products might not be well-received by this week’s opposition, the ridiculous Badger players unveiled a tea comprising: ham sandwiches, bacon quiche, packets of ham, sausage rolls, pork pies and a whole tub of honey and mustard sausages. A stern telling-off could well have been in order were it not for the fact that the sausage chef was none other than Foord himself.

The Kingstonian innings began like a bullet from a gun, with boundaries sprayed left, right and centre. The famous Kingstonian danger opener had punished the Badgers before and was looking as if he could do so again. As the nervous fielders edged further and further away from his hitting zone, Allyn Blake stepped forward with a glint in his eye. Slower ball number 1 – just kept out. Slower ball number 2 – chipped in the air and caught! The fielders gleefully congratulated Blake and catcher Dollimore for a crucial breakthrough.

That wasn’t quite the end of the story but wickets continued to fall at regular intervals and the Badgers eventually wrapped up a 34-run victory. A Paul Cole wonder catch and victory grunt off his own bowling helped them on their way, as did 3-wickets from a fired-up Hamblin.

The only tinge of disappointment came from a Mackrell finger breakage that saw him carted off to hospital instead of to the AGM. In his absence, the rest of the team toasted his appointment as next season’s captain and giggled at the cock and balls drawn in Cadey’s notebook when he wasn’t looking.

Season fini.

Saturday 20th September 2014 Badgers Battersea Badgers vs Kingstonian Kingstonian

Battersea Badgers 200 for 10 (40 overs)

  • Cloke 59 (80)
  • Mackrell 54 (26)
  • Unknown 3/20 (8)
  • Unknown 3/47 (8)

Kingstonian 166 for 10 (35 overs)

  • Unknown 35 (0)
  • Unknown 26 (0)
  • Hamblin 3/54 (8)
  • Mackrell 2/2 (4)
  • Mcluskey 2/11 (3)
  • Cole 2/40 (7)
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